Let’s call her Mary. I first met her when I was young; I was 8 years old and she was 4. I can’t really remember what exactly happened that day, but flashes of her playing alone in the neighborhood tickles my brain… even as of this moment.
Ever since that day we became playmates.
Being a shy and reserved child that I used to be, I didn’t have a lot of friends. Scratch that, I didn’t have friends. Grade school classmates aren’t much of my friends since the only time we communicate was during in class and after that, we went on with our separate lives. Aside from that, I spent most of the time indoors, either playing alone with my dolls and kitchen toy set, or practicing how to read and write. Which is why, meeting her and being friends with her was one of the few highlights of my childhood days.
Of course there’s a visible difference that lies between Mary and I. First, she’s really pretty. She has fairer complexion than I do, she has a long brown hair that looks so soft, she looks healthier, and she is smarter for her age (must’ve been running in their family). Also, we don’t live in the same part of town. She lives in an executive subdivision, and I live in a small compound. The only reason why she’s always near my house is because she stays with her grandparents during weekdays, as her parents are out for work. Her grandparents house was a couple of steps away from our compound. It nice as well; it wasn’t that big but it’s an elegant, spacious 1-storey house with two cozy bedrooms and a grand piano on their living room. Oh, and don’t forget the marbled floors and chandeliers up in the ceiling.
Whenever she’s at her grandparents’, she would pick me up at our house together with her nanny so we can play back at theirs. We would play with her kitchen set that’s larger than mine, pick flowers in their garden, watch afternoon cartoon shows, do outdoor activities, and other things kids do. Sometimes, her grandparents would drag me along with them whenever they go to mall or other places so we can still hangout even outside. We would bid goodbye as soon as sun sets and say hello again as soon as another day arrives.
There were days when I look forward seeing Mary, but there were also days when I didn’t. Especially when other people were around. Just because I’m comfortable around her doesn’t mean I also do when I’m around her parents. And just like how I feel about a lot of people, I felt very intimidated by Mary’s parents. I mean, who doesn’t? They both work in a bank, wear corporate clothes, and the smell of their perfume lingers in the air whenever they’re passing by. So whenever her parents are visiting her grandparents’ with her, I felt the need to stick around Mary and follow her whenever she goes so they won’t be able to make a little conversation with me.
Another year passed by, and this time, we didn’t see each other much. Mary just started grade school, and I’m on my 5th grade. We focused on our schooling but whenever she has the time to go back to her grandparents’ house, she still picks me up, just like the old times.
However, it was different.
Maybe it was the fact that she’s starting to realize the difference between our social status or that she’s really starting to become annoyed at me. It didn’t really bother me when she asked about how average of a person I am or how her expressions tell me she didn’t like the cheap Christmas gifts I got her.
But one day while we were playing at their garage, I saw writings on one of her educational posters. The penmanship was very familiar as I’ve seen her notebooks before, so I knew it was hers. Written there was my name, along with the words ugly and annoying.
I acted as if nothing was wrong for the rest of the day. But as soon as I saw my father behind their gates, I went towards him and asked to send me home.
I hid in my room that night, sobbing quietly, feeling both upset and sad. That moment I realized I can never be friends with someone who think so lowly of me. I thought she’s a true friend. Yet now it felt like I was just a tool she used, a puppet, someone who can be with her whenever she feels bored.
So, I did what I have to.
I didn’t come back to Mary’s house.
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